‘We Live Here: The Midwest' poignantly explores the queer experience in Middle America today

The documentary, now on available on Hulu, scrambles narratives about who lives where in the United States

Around election time, and especially following presidential elections in which Republicans win, there’s one moment I always dread: When liberals declare some variation on “fuck Middle America,” or “screw all those dumb people in red states.” Often, there’s some variation on those people having “voted against their interests,” as articulated in the monumentally stupid book What’s the Matter With Kansas. Things get even uglier when there’s a natural disaster or a train derailment in a red state, and we get to hear declarations that those people “got what they voted for.” 

I hate that sort of attitude, for a few reasons, and not only because I’m a native of the Midwest. One, it’s just generally wrong to dismiss, or even celebrate, the misfortune of your fellow man, just because they don’t vote the way you do. The right-wing version, of gloating about urban crime because “they voted for this,” is just as ugly. 

But this is terrible for another reason: American populations don’t break down nearly that neatly. Because every red state has pockets of liberals, and every blue state has plenty of conservatives.  New York has Archie Bunkers everywhere (RIP Norman Lear). I live in a blue county in a blue state, and there are blocks minutes from my house in which every house has a Trump sign. 

Meanwhile, every red state has college towns, as well as hippie enclaves like Talkeetna, Alaska. The Deep South is solidly Republican and is also filled with Black people who lean Democratic. And even California has massive amounts of rural areas.  If a state goes by one party by a 70-30 margin, that 30 percent still consists of tens or even hundreds of thousands of people who voted with the minority. 

However, recent events have indicated that red and blue areas of the country are beginning to separate themselves further than ever before. A lot of conservative people, especially during the pandemic, have made a big show out of moving from blue states to red ones.

At the same time, anti-LGBTQ laws in lots of red states, including those that ban various levels of health care for trans people, have made it untenable for many such people to remain in those states- which would appear to be the plan anyway. Post-Dobbs anti-abortion laws in red states, meanwhile, seem certain to encourage many liberal people, especially women, to leave those states. 

No, there’s not going to be a civil war, or a “national divorce,” but the sorting of America is beginning to move even faster.

A new documentary called We Live Here: The Midwest looks at this dynamic- specifically, what it’s like for LGBTQ people who live in Midwestern red states. And it’s not only the laws- sometimes it’s difficulty with their churches, communities, and family members. 

Directed by Melinda Maerker and David Clayton Miller, We Live Here: The Midwest interviews several queer people and families who live in Middle America, about their recent experiences. We hear from a couple in which the husband transitioned to female, another in which both are trans women and a gay male couple, and many share heartbreaking stories about parents, siblings, and even children who have rejected them. 

“There is something called Iowa Nice” are the first words spoken, and I’m going to let slide the blatant appropriation of “Minnesota Nice.” Though all kidding aside, there are parts of the Midwest, starting with Minnesota, which offers progressive laws and protection for queer people. One person in the documentary, Heather Keeler, is an openly gay state legislator in Minnesota.

That said, even a state with progressive laws won’t make queer people immune from the cruelest shunning by family members or peers. It’s a very sad dilemma that no policy can fix.

Ironically, the phrase “We live here” is somewhat right-coded, thanks to its association with the movie Red Dawn. 

The documentary, lasting just an hour, is now streaming on Hulu, and it makes a fine companion piece to Daresha Kyi’s Mama Bears, a documentary that showed at festivals last year and landed on PBS’ Independent Lens this summer. In that one, mothers – including many of the Christian faith who live in rural, conservative areas — have stood by and supported their queer children.